Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Miss Manners Disapproves of You Grinding Your Crotch Into Your Backup Dancer's Face

Boys and girls, this hot mess is just too much.

In case you haven't heard, the American Music Awards last week ended in controversy when Adam Lambert, runner-up on American Idol (I like to emphasize that he was the runner-up since no one else seems to realize it) this past season, did several questionable things, including an impromptu makeout session with a keyboardist and, perhaps most hilariously, grinding his male backup dancer's face into his crotch.

...Emily Post just fainted.

Since then, Lambert has toured the interview circuit as both apologetic and rebellious. It seems that he's not über-proud of his performance, but thinks everyone just needs to calm down.

I say this with all due respect: Mr. Lambert, you're the one who needs to calm down.

Don't forget that you hardly won this season of Idol. Yes, in the end, you'll probably sell a million more albums than the soft-spoken winner, Kris Allen, but you're hardly a rock god yet. Your performance was the over-the-top ridiculousness that belongs to those who have paid their dues in the music world. It's great that you're so enthusiastic about being a rock star, but keep your performances in check. It wasn't the most responsible thing to do.

Speaking of responsible... I honestly find the media's performance during this whole catastrophe to be worlds more deplorable than Lambert's.

First: he's not a beacon of hope for the gay community. Not every homosexual or bisexual celebrity has a civic duty to further the cause. To wit: Billie Joel Armstrong, lead singer of Green Day, Neil Patrick Harris, Christina Aguilera, Fergie, and even the late, great Kurt Cobain were all professed homosexuals and bisexuals and none of them are/were expected to further the cause. Why's it so different with Glambert?

Second, and perhaps most importantly: don't turn this whole debacle into something it's not. The controversy isn't about Lambert kissing his male keyboardist; it's about the crotch-meets-face thing. To make the story more controversial, the media has acted as though the makeout session was the objectionable point, but that couldn't be further from the truth.

Lambert did nothing but goose his sales for his album For Your Entertainment with this performance. His career is hardly tarnished; a scandal like this does good things for a performer, not bad.

I wish everyone would just kinda grow up about this. Yes, Lambert simulating oral sex was pretty risqué. I certainly hope that he'll think a bit harder next time. But this isn't worth this level of controversy.

Anyone else tired of this whole saga? Who's more at fault: the media or Lambert himself? Sound off in the comments section!


frogponder said...

I look at this from the angle of - what does an artist have to do next to grab some headlines? I keep thinking they have run out of options and then we have Crotch Gate.

Kevin said...

Frog - they'll never run out of options. It's a vicious, unending circle.

generic viagra said...

Honestly it seemed to me gratesco .. It is a lack of education to do that on national television ... and all for attention ... Total lack of manners